4 Components of Power Listening

Have you ever had a conversation with someone who made you feel like you were the only person in the world at that moment? Did it make you feel really important? Did that person make you feel he/she was truly engaged with what you were saying?

That person knew, subconsciously perhaps, how to be a “power listener”. It’s a technique that is very useful in either social or professional settings to get the most from a conversation.

Here are 4 simple techniques to use when listening to get the most from the conversation:


Maintain good eye contact. By doing this, you are showing your conversation partner that you are fully engaged and interested in what he or she is saying. Use the 80/20 rule, in which 80% of the time your eyes are meeting your speaking partner’s, and 20% of the time, your eyes are roaming as you gather information to say.


Slow your thought processes down. The average person speaks between 135 and 160 words per minute, but the average person’s brain works between 400 and 600 words per minute. This means your thoughts are a lot faster than your conversation partner’s mouth, which makes it easy for your mind to drift. Work to stop your mind from shifting away from the conversation; be truly present. You be able to fully absorb what your partner says and be able to respond in kind, which makes them feel appreciated and understood.


Give a little feedback. Make the effort to give the occasional nod, smile, or other sign of recognition to your conversation partner. There’s nothing worse than speaking to someone who gives no verbal feedback. It’s like talking to a wall. These nonverbal cues may seem trivial, but have tremendous impact by showing your interest, understanding and involvement in the conversation.


Create a welcoming space for your conversation partner. When you are speaking one-on-one with someone from a seated position, lean slightly in, open up your chest, pull your shoulders back, and fold your hands gently in your lap or on the table in front of you. If you are standing, form a reversed hand steeple, in which the fingers come together to form a point. When someone steeples in the lap area, it displays that they understand & accept what’s being said.

Have a great day!



5 Steps to Thriving…..not just Surviving

Sometimes, our biggest successes come out of our greatest challenges. Why is this so?  Our most basic instinct is to survive, but merely to survive suggests a level of personal pain that most people would not tolerate. The logical consequence then is to find a why to turn the proverbial “lemons into lemonade”. As Einstein once said,  “Crisis is the greatest blessing for people and nations, because crisis brings on progress… It’s in crisis that inventive discoveries and great strategies rise. He who overcomes a crisis overcomes himself without being ‘Overcome.’”

Tony Robbins suggests these 5 steps to turn our “lemons into lemonade”:

1] Let the crisis turn us into action. Say good-bye to the stagnation & fear caused by the crisis & start doing something about it. Massive action will create positive feelings; allow ourselves to feel the negatives about the crisis & drive into the action that will start to solve it.

2] Focus on what we can control. Don’t worry about things outside of our control; we can become paralyzed if we do that – along with being depressed, stressed & overwhelmed. Keeping lazer-focused on taking massive action where we have an impact will keep positive feelings coming.

3] Decide & commit to our plan. Commitment will stop the inevitable distractions from getting us off-target. Realize the importance of prioritizing our action plan among all of life’s choices. This commitment may seem like “war”, but it’s an essential step in the process.

4] Resolve to make the changes. Once we’ve made the commitment above, nothing is there to stop us from getting to the goal we’ve set for ourselves. Continuing our Massive Action Plan will be continually reinforcing to accelerate us to our goal.

5] Give back when we’ve reached our goal. Give back to all those who have supported us along this journey, with a little reward left for ourselves to celebrate the accomplishment.

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The Secret Behind Scrapping That Personal To-Do List

Most of us are frustrated by our inability to accomplish what we really want in our personal or professional lives. Why do you wonder how you can work so hard and still not attain the achievement and satisfaction you’re looking for?

In this day,  many of us are challenged like never before in our professional & personal lives with challenges coming from every direction, but working harder doesn’t seem to translate into solid results.  Maybe the reason is that we’re still using the time-management methods that our parents & grandparents used – in many cases, the traditional “to-do list”.

We have to understand the big difference between movement and achievement. Maybe going the “to-do list” works during our trips to the grocery store, but otherwise what is the guarantee completing the “to-do list”in more complex scenarios actually will give the desired result? Have you ever completed your list & still haven’t come up with any accomplishments other than whatever satisfaction you get from doing it?

The Rapid Planning Method [RPM] system is different from traditional time-management systems out there. Because, rather that being a time or life management system,  it’s really just different way of thinking. And it works by focusing you on the key results that are most important in your life — not on your activity or to-do list.

To help you better understand the RPM system and philosophy, I break it down to its three main components:

1] – FOCUS & CLARITY:  What do you want to achieve? By being crystal-clear on the end result, we always have the end result in mind & can program ourselves to have only those thoughts & actions necessary to get there.

2] – YOUR “WHY”: What benefit will you receive by achieving the result? What “Pain” will you avoid? This provides the emotional energy needed to avoid distractions & maintain a consistent path to the result. It will also be the energy to shift gears if a challenge springs up & demands a new course to the result.

3] – A MASSIVE ACTION PLAN [MAP]: These are the individual steps necessary to achieve the desired result.  We may several alternate ways to achieve our result, and the MAP allows us to take any of them that will result in our objective. In a way, they are like the “to-do list”, but they have a basis in the end result rather than simply the motions. The 10X Rule, by Grant Cardone, stresses that most any worthwhile objective will likely take 10X the commitment, or effort than we originally budgeted for it in time or funds. We have to make this commitment & investment to finally get what we want.

By committing to practice RPM in our business & professional lives, we find a new productivity & efficiency & actually achieve our desired results. Working harder is not the total answer; working smarter at the same time will result in our ability to be everything we want to be.

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The reason for living is giving

The secret to living is giving. No matter how busy or broke you may be, you always have something to offer others – even if it just a kind “hello”. Many people miss the opportunity to know that their life makes a difference – but it does. Your life matters – and if you accept that you’re here not just to “get” but to give, then other people will feel your authenticity and they will open up to you.

Giving back to other people and your community, reminds you of what you’re made for. Focusing on the needs of others motivates you to do more than you thought possible. You feel the benefits immediately. You become more productive and find creative solutions to problems. You find strength even though you may be exhausted. That’s because life supports that which improves the quality of life. When we contribute to our community, we become part of something that is bigger than ourselves.


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